Dude, she's so old there's a chalk outline where her reproductive organs used to be.
I submitted an essay to my history teacher comparing changes in the middle ages to the song changes by David Bowie. I can't wait to see my grade on that.
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
don't you dare blame getting arrested on me. you sugested we play the penis game and we all know I'm a strong competitor
She fell down no less than 4 times while we were at the club. One of which was while she was in the bathroom stall next to me.
I feel like I was eaten by a coyote, then shit over a cliff...
Masturbating during the Olympics and cumming during the national anthem really is everything it's cracked up to be. Just thought you should know.
The only word that describes how much hair I shaved off of my ass is "considerable".
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
I dont have to work tomorrow im yelling gibberish at squirrels
Got promoted and on my way out the door was informed that my beard makes my face perfect for riding. Today is gonna be a good day.
I wrote myself a letter, like I think drunk me wants to be pen pals or something
Cause I know you wanna ride the D like a Vespa in ROMAN HOLIDAY
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
It’s a 10 inch dick! Of course I’m getting a Brazilian
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