And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
She refered to her bed as the "cockpit"....I understand that this morning.
...and the foreplay consisted of me threatening to cut off his hand if he didn't remove it from my back.
I forgot how wholesome of a place a park is when youre not drinking there.
We wore fake mustaches and shirts that said team mustache ride to a party we weren't even invited to
I never should have let my cousin and his pregnant girlfriend move in with me. I'm never having sex again. They scare off men more than 'my dream wedding' pin board.
I'm convinced that the Christmas lights in my room contributed to the great sex.
IF IT WALKS LIKE A MANWHORE AND QUACKS LIKE A MANWHORE, HE PROBABLY HAS VD.
Do you hit a new low in life when you have to carry around a puke bag in your purse when you're hungover?
You did a body shot out of her belly button with a bendy straw.
Just looked for hours for the remote. Found it in my purse. I need to drink less.
you know you're in deep when you watch fear and loathing in las vegas and every damn scene is relatable.
Well, I'll handle this like I always do. Black the fuck out, make out with randoms, give out my number like candy. You know. Standard operating procedure
Get to the bar now. Ryan is single again and every skank on campus that has heard story about his dick is circling like a shark. A cock hungry shark
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