I'm at a bar that has girls so awful looking even you would not have sex with them.
Well... I doubt that.
using my metrocard to split lines. it says optimism on the back. i am optimistic that you will appear at my door and help me finish all these drugs.
This is not a drunk text right now. This is an i want your dick text. There is a difference.
hey got me stoned for the first time when i was 14. there is no bond stronger
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
just saw a former disney star do a keg stand. her life choices have improved.
Dude, she told me she wanted to bang my dad. I don't know which is worse, the fact that she wants to or the fact that she told me.
I went commando last night, then accidentally flashed a police van...They acknowledged it.
Just woke up from a weed coma and found a stem in my bra. Rainy day success.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My dad is so drunk he attempted to ride my two year old cousin's tricycle. For a solid five minutes.
Can we just talk about how the only thing I have on my camera from this weekend is a video of you putting your whole fist in your mouth hahahha
I have been drunk every time I've gone to mexico. I do not remember mexico.
These past few weeks have been a lesson on why you don't put your penis inside girls who live in your building.
New drinking game, drink every time Rhianna says "Work" in her new song.
When the people downstairs start talking about drugs, I second guess buying my drugs from them. Then I remember they are cheap and convenient.
Randomize