She went from zero to smokin in five shots
I can handle NPR. I speak hippie. I took it in college.
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
Just checked my phone. Sometime last night I googled sex positions in a tent. Was there even a tent there?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That is true. Vodka is like a dog. Always loyal, warm, and there for you when you need it
Also I just took a shit at a bar so always remember that ANYTHING is possible.
A beer is a heart your wish makes!!!
Would you be mad if I just used the argument "I'm allowed to say that, my best friend is a lesbian"?
Never. I'm proud to help you win arguments.
For not really liking Christmas, I have an astounding amount of holiday-themed lingerie
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also my face is like def lowkey made of silly putty
So how do you explain to your boss that Siri called him mid sex?
Beer and xanax may be a bad combo, but I don't really care due to the beer and the xanax.
Holy shit my cat won't leave the lube alone
After I asked for my 6th Gin & Tonic, the look on the flight attendant's face started to make me feel bad about myself.
Right now I'm laying face down on my carpet in my living room in the darkness sending work emails from my phone.
It's a glamorous life.
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