i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
If the pens lose tonight I'm gonna drive to Detroit and burn 8 mile to the ground.
Actually I may do that regardless. Probably get my own holiday.
oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
So Ive decided I have serious issues. Im walking around the school with a bag labeled booze money collecting from people while slightly hungover at 8:20 in the morning, and nobody is questioning me.
We've finally become those guys who you'd see in middle school when you went to the park who are just stoned out of their minds sitting on the swings.
Found a left over fake Olympic medal from our party last weekend. Awarded it to a random girl in the bar last night. Its the only thing she was wearing this morning when she woke up at my place.
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
I might never shower again without beer.. I might also always drink naked
Today I met the neighbor that shares my bedroom wall. When I pointed out my unit, he said, "Oh, that's you? Oh... that's you." I didn't think much of it until I was in bed tonight and I heard him clear his throat. He's. Heard. Everything.
there are teeth marks in the soap. why are there teeth marks in the soap.
I really resent how she stayed home and ruined my plans to watch sci-fi and masturbate.
He ate a Doritos taco from my boobs. Does your boyfriend do that?
On the flip side, we did almost have sex wearing a gorilla mask and deer antlers.............
I'm not in it for just the sex. If I wanted mediocre dick once a week I would have stayed with one of my exes.
I hate when my Bumble matches make it hard for me to stalk them.
Randomize
