He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
I suppose drinking a cosmo at lunch alone can't look good but I mean... sometimes it's just necessary
I don't know if you remember, but I was only wearing an afghan.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Waking and baking in my bathtub. In a giant sweater. And no pants. This is going to be the best 420 ever.
But please don't judge me if i smell like mustard
theres a new barista at starbuck holy fuck she's hot
i want to face-plant into her vagina
Holy hangover, going dancing with family good idea, taking the last shot with the transvestite bar owner not so much...
He better not be in your backpack
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Let's go. I'm waiting for my time to shine among the stars of never never land. Make sure you bring my Peter Pan costume this time. Shit's bout to get real glittery.
I finally had to say "that's the hole where I pee" for him to understand.
We share an apartment, weed and genitals. It's called being practical not in love.
That was just an endearing nickname I called you before. I'm not gonna call you a filthy slut now that you are one, I don't want to hurt your feelings.
Death by dick. An honorable death. Put a picture of his dick in the photo collage at my funeral.
You were licking skittles to check if they were "halucinateizers" so no, you are not leaving the house while on antibiotics.
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