i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
I didn't want to talk to him so I just started telling him how important Jesus was to me
you don't seem to understand just how much pasta i spilled on my bed last night.
I didn't realize how much I missed him until his balls were back in my mouth..
You just kept mumbling, "Shit shit shit, the muffin man owes me money." Repeatedly.
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
I'm on strict orders from her to keep sleeping with you until you give her a job next summer.
I'm gonna go out in a limb and say living out middle school fantasies is never a good idea
I'm not wearing underwear, I started my period this morning, and it's super windy. Recipe for disaster?
I think a van full of parolees just blew me kisses. Thoughts?
You should probably stop your little brother from ruining thanksgiving. I just caught him trying to stuff a cake in a drawer... And now he's puking.
Just listened to a full Christian rock song, loved it,listened to the dj send a prayer to a 4th grader who was having a tough year and realized I'm high as fuk
Banana suit guy has an entourage and they're all douchebags. There is no god.
Finally hooked up with her. She bought me tacos after because "she can do better in a bed". You're gonna be my best man.
I STUDIED GEOGRAPHY I KNOW THIS SHIT!! DON'T YOU DARE QUESTION MY AUTHORITY ON GLACIAL DEPOSITION AGAIN BITCH!!
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