whats a more ladylike way to say "fuck me on your lunch break"?
I found a vibrator in my car and it's not mine...this is becoming a weird day.
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
I usually just read books and meditate to an aquatic soundtrack of sea walrus's mating. But ill choose coors light instead
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm high and craving hash browns from McDonalds. Please pick me up. I also would like a hug and a supportive pat on the back when you get here. Thanks.
Its two in the afternoon. McDonalds don't sell hash browns at 2 in the afternoon. Whore. The hug I can provide however.
You told me if you could get your shoes on, you deserved a coke and rum. We never made it to the party.
You did it first. I was merely expressing my support for you, by pressing my testicles against a window.
Yes I slept with him, he was the only one not wearing a costume. Guys with costumes are just trying to impress you.
Remember that time I sent you a 5lb bag of gummie bears?
Like it was yesterday.
Apparently I had it on auto deliver. So whoever is at your apt is gonna gen an interesting delivery...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
This medicine is making me nuts. I just woke up and I thought I was in a glass case with Asians staring at me.
You were staring right at you dick at the urinals, then looked at all the other guys dicks and fist pumped saying "I win!"
i think ive been high everyday since ive met you
So I think my neighbor's name is Olli if I'm hearing the girl the girl he's fucking clearly
He just fucked me into paralysis. can't feel my hands or face.
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