the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
I think I'm still fucked. I can see the electricty going through the street car lines
I'm going to keep a tally of how many lives I ruin this summer. Starting today.
Already at 3 and it's not even noon.
Friendly reminder that on the walk home you tripped but instead of falling to the sidewalk, you tried to save it and ended up headbutting my ex-boyfriend in the balls. ILU.
Doing bumps while the kids play upstairs. #bestnannyever
guys I just made $20 cause these random south african guys thought I wasn't wearing any underwear
I've got enough liquor to do one of two things on Friday: 1.) Drink myself into a coma or 2.) lay in bed a drunk and cry lonely mess. Happy Valentines Day.
No more chicken and waffles served by drag queens at 2 AM. :(
At least his std test came back clean, gotta look at the positives here
okay yeah but you've seen me eat jambalaya naked
Every time our eyes meet, I silently summon him to my vagina.
He has a baby picture of himself on the night stand. I don't think this whole 'one night stand' thing is for me.
If my body were a person, it would be beating the shit out of me for what I did to it last night.
Randomize
