New universal law, if a movie has a Rob Zombie song in it, its probably a bad movie.
And next time, don't pick a fight with me when you're naked. That's just not fair
great, thanks for announcing that I gave you head over twitter
at least I said it was good
I just took boredom to a whole new level. I just auto-tuned and remixed today's western civ lecture
I'm scared. I feel like she's my mom and she just walked in on me having sex. Like she's "disappointed"
I'm pretty sure you can't just waltz into a walk in clinic and ask them to de-baby you.
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
I woke up on the stairs at of a Disneyland hotel. Yes, my night was amazing.
didn't know how to tell his mom I was confused about how long we'd been together because we banged for a full year before making it official
he threw up on me, hugged my legged and then started laughing. when i asked him why, he said "it's like the sour patch kids commercials."
Fuck. I just got my nipple tweaked by a plus size drag queen in a purple dress. I feel like I got molested by Grimace.
I would have to gauge my vagina to make it fit.
And by defning the relationship I mean telling him I'm gonna fuck other people but its cool If he does the same.
What's the plan?
Not sure. I think I'll take a dump on his windshield.
Is it sad to eat a candy bra by yourself?
Randomize
