You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
Smoked a bowl on a rollercoaster. Literally ON. Beat that.
She came over with Guinness cupcakes, a case of Mickeys, wearing an Ireland flag & nothing else.
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
I'm okay.. I had a good heart to heart with the cab driver Raheem - it's going to be our year.
there seems to be a considerable amount of hair missing from my left hand. i may have lit it on fire again
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
we've called him dos banos ever since he threw up in 2 separate bathrooms with the same puke
Don't mind the bowl full of ashes in the sink. I meant to set that on fire.
That sad moment when even your drug dealer lands a summer internship and you don't...
I'm texting you the word "cockring" because I feel it hasn't been said enough throughout our friendship.
I want to fuck the side burns off of Steve.
You cant use biscuit as a chaser
Just kidding. Don't worry, you're getting sugar and orgasms for Valentine's day.
I got horny for like a second but the eggplant snapped me out of it
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