I just won Halloween Walk of Shame Bingo!
they started a semi-successful rumor that toby keith died. who says fraternities don't have goals
I almost puked on my graduation application. perfect.
i was on the fence about his sexual orientation until he referred to his marlboro loghts as "carrie bradshaws"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
woke up with the dennys waiters MYSPACE link on the back of my receipt...yep one of those nights
we were running to make last call and you stopped me and said very seriously "if i fall, go on without me. just make sure theres a beer in my hand when you go"
We almost forgot to tip the maids, so we left the rest of the gin, some tonic water and a lime. They earned it
How soon is too soon to enter the slutty phase of this breakup?
You said "sustain yourself" quietly over and over as you fed joeys hamster cashews. Acid you is a trip
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I know you're on vacation but you should know I just walk of shamed through a hotel lobby while leaving a threesome on Friday the 13th. Fuck superstition, I win.
Exactly. Some of us want to get married. And some of us want to wear sombreros and do cocaine. To each their own.
He said he was gonna go pull a lochte and the next thing we know he's outside ass naked peeing in the neighbors kiddie pool.
Dude imagine how many pictures of dicks Obama gets. That can't be unusual. Almost every kids in the US has written the president a letter.
Oh shit. My drunken car sex is on Google Earth.
He kept telling me that it stood for Sex Utility Vehicle
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