Hey I found a place that'll do a hand job for 42 bucks
this may or may not be the weed talking, but this is by far the best tasting toothpaste i've ever had
wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
I stayed up for an hour trying to make my room stop spinning and then I realized it was bc my fan was on
Every one of her profile pictures looks like an ad for American Apparel. Of course she has syphilis.
so many types of cookies right now. i'm eating four kinds of cookies that i've made into larger cookie sandwiches. too high. whoa.
We need to buy some popsicles so we can remind ourselves we're good at this.
I couldn't sleep so I drunk ellipticaled for an hour. Worst. Idea. Ever.
It's great having no responsibilities. In normal life I would be freaking the fuck out right about now. But the only worry I have from last night is where i got this shower caddy full of cookies. God I love college.
He's only going to be gone for two weeks
That's two months in gay whore years.
Whenever you have to pee or whatever I'll be over here to harass you
Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this.
Do we have to do this party tonight? I'm worried my bed will miss me...
There should be a guide book that probation officers hand out on "how to tell a tinder girl about your ankle monitor before she notices it at the worst possible moment"
Actually, my eyes didn't start bleeding until the next day. So it was a pretty awesome night overall.
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