I just woke up to a guy kissing me goodbye and leaving for class. I don't know where I am, don't have any clothes on, my underwear are gone, and the shoes I found with my dress aren't mine. He just walked in and gave me my phone. I was on my period. Come get me I will walk to the nearest intersection and wait.
just woke up in my neighbors garage.
scratch that. I'm like 6 miles from my house in a random garage.
just saw a man remove a wedgie from his lady's ass. who says chivalry is dead.
we live in such a classy society.
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
im honestly more upset that i fucked a buckeyes fan than about cheating on my boyfriend...
she screamed "gravy"!!! in the guys face and then stole the very large mans food in line ahead of us... that was just the beginging of the police report.
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
Her mom walked into the garage as we were smoking a kush blunt with sombreros on.
His roommates came in and started a dance party in his room while we were having sex. He said it wasnt the first time.
AND I JUST GOT FUCKING DAUGHTER ZONED. NO. I'M DONE. I HATE BOYS. ASEXUALITY HERE I COME.
She ordered an O'douls. That was the end of that date
Wait... why were you finger painting at one in the morning?
You're up at 3AM, right? I have a very important question.
You know the Wendy's on route 6, by Kohls? Do you know if it has a drive through?
Yes it does.
wait. i have to tell u something. and it has nothing to do with dildos or spiders
welp, we watched the human centipede high last night and my mind literally shut down, when i came to all i could hear was mel saying EAT EAT HIS SHIT
Randomize
