Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
you should have seen his reaction to my boobs, it was like he just met god
I like when I have the chance to say normal things like 'I know her from college' vs 'I did a ton of blow with her one night at Studio B.'
basically theres shrimp everywhere. splattered on the walls, in the carpet, its bad. ohh theyre never gonna get the smell out.
You're like the curious george of whores
Yeah. I realized I have a weakness for drugs and I need to move somewhere where I don't know how to find them.
Alas, very true. I'll sell some of my eggs and give you like 10%
And with my 90% I'll get a scooter with a sidecar. And a pony. Also with sidecar.
There is a positive side to a sinus infection. Exclusively cowgirl sex. I've convinced her I'd pass out if I had to do the work.
You went streaking and came back with your shirt inside out. Then said "it happens in the line of duty" and passed out.
Jake and I will do a protection ritual for ur dick I don't know where she has been
just sex-dialed 911. that's 34 seconds of dignity i will never get back.
Have you ever just sat there and thought about past penises?
If your gig isn't over in 30 minutes I am coming on that stage to come on your dick.
Once again, your first date sounds like something of an epic. Odysseus' Quest for Fourth Base.
I wish there was a tumbleweed emoji. Because that would describe my vagina.
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