and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
What are the odds of finding the one hot Australian dude with erecile dysfunction?
I'm more concerned about the fact that I can't feel my gums
I'm pretty sure this city writes new vice laws specifically because of us.
She's doing hand stands on the train as I type. Idk if I'm impressed it embarrassed. Or turned on.
He showed up at my house, drunk, proclaiming that he needed to fuck me...my dad let him in
we're drinking bellinis i mean god's titty nectar
Well after we were arrested you just kept chanting "Like a good neighbor state farm is there"
Well, I crapped my pants in front of her entire family, was laughed out of their house, and I had to walk home with shit stained pants. So, yeah, it went really well.
He walked into me masturbating to a framed picture of Bill Murray riding a t-rex
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