what about "I will fuck you for a jamba juice" do you not understand?
is it sad that whenever i need to spell "independent" i still sing that one rap song?
If you weren't supposed to have sex with your ex then they wouldn't rhyme.
I have too much pride to pick his chest hair out of my mouth again
explain the broken jalepenos in my underwear drawer?
Would it be inappropriate to do a science fair project on whether the type of drunk a person is is determined by nature or nurture
dude you're not even a fucking science major
I think it's a scientific achievement that I can make jelly that is 95% vodka so suck it up.
Doug will be the one to get my vagina. I don't know when or how but I'm now declaring that it is his. And he better not disappoint.
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
Like if Ohio doesn't think I can get smashed on wine I will gladly prove them wrong
Aka I'm headed to the liquor store because I don't know how to handle my emotions.
Remind me to NEVER AGAIN mix beer with tequila with beer with whiskey with vodka with rum with vodka.
my vagina can't handle any more of our 4 day long smash bash. it should be like a holiday or something. should only happen once a year.
you tried to make the parrot smoke your joint
We're hate flirting, damnit.
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