Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
get your tongue out of his mouth and answer your phone. if your not doing more than making out i'm gonna be so pissed. i'm about to sleep in your car bitch
i feel like my life has become an afroman song and idk whether i should be sad about that or not
I thought she was mad at me, but then we did a pose off and I realized we're friends for life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
Just got a event reminder on my phone to never party with you again.
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
Call me next time you want to get irresponsibly drunk when we have grown up things to do the next day.
Fantastic. I'm pretty cold, tired, dirty, and hungry, but that comes with an adventurous weekend. Who needs a wallet or keys anyway? I could totally be homeless.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also I legit had a girl at my bar crying tonight saying to her friend "why did he have to take his top off ?"
woke up to a family dragging me under their beach umbrella, they poured water on me bc they "thought I was dead" then fed me quesadillas and nursed me back to health... gotta love Cabo
Even dream me is a champ at smoking weed
Thanks for fucking me in last night
TUCKING. TUCKING ME IN LAST NIGHT
Look, I've got a really big car. We just need to put ourselves in it and put some body parts in other body parts.
I'm 4,715,723% sure I don't give a fuck.
Randomize