You got ahold of his prescription papers and gave out prescriptions for cranberry and vodka
Oh so it was one of those "I shouldn't have gotten in a cab with a random 21 year old girl" kinda nights.
i feel like pizza bites are my only friend right now
That makes the second boyfriend of hers that I've fucked. I'm gonna start keeping an eye on every guy she even speaks to. Girl is my sexual rabbit's foot.
just go where the car takes you. fingers crossed its here with breakfast.
I'm the fucking queen of sexting. I just made a blowjob sound so poetic I'm wishing I were a guy just so I could blow me. Learn from me.
Uhh... I think I meant "Be proud, I'm taking shots before my public speaking test." "Coffee and vodka is not good" and "Also, I'm giving blood drunk."
My professor laid down on the floor and told us a story that involved being naked covered in Vaseline with a pumpkin on your head. No lie. This is going to be a great semester.
I think the moment I knew you were going to black out was when I told you how many shots you had already and you were shocked and then poured another one
Told some guy to hold your weave while you "tried" to kick his girlfriends ass...
Now I can't say for certain but I'm 90 percent are I bathed myself with dog shampoo last night
We were in the middle of a serious discussion about social justice and he pulled sequins out of his teeth and kept talking like nothing had happened.
I told him I felt we were at the point where if I saw him talking to another girl, I'd probably choke him out. So I guess you could say things are getting serious.
Our prom king just sent me a dick pic. I know it's 10 years later but I feel like I've finally made it.
Just told my mom life fisted my asshole. She looked at me with complete understanding. I'm scared...
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