did you wind up at some random place? and do you remember face planting into the fireplace?
Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
You should come over. I am making a celebratory I got laid by a huge penis cake.
Just had to explain to a senior manager why I had duct tape residue on my wrist and hand. This weekend was a success.
Why is there blood and lettuce everywhere?
My kindergarten teacher served me... All coming full circle
Typical Sunday afternoon purchase of condoms and a helium tank.
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
Holy Hangover.. I'm marrying whoever put this water by my bed
Soooo you know how I said I was trying to be a rational adult? Well that led to me fucking a rational adult today.
On a side note. I slept with a stuffed giraffe last night. Found it in my bed when I came home and snuggled with it. Drunk me reverted to being 2
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
Idk if you own a vibrator or anything but it's not smart to leave it in dad's car for him to find :/
I learned the hard way a garbage bag will not save you when jumping from a tree at 2am
Can I say it was a great night out of town? Fucking my co-worker in the hotel bed while my best friend is fucking his friend on the floor and a random guy is laying in the other bed meanwhile we are all passing a joint back and forth
Randomize
