Her father's a cardiologist, her mom's a lawyer...she just went from a 5 to a 10 real quick.
Most eventful shower ever. Jacked off, peed and puked in there.
its fine. mom just made me chug a long island. and made a crying face when i balked. we'll talk tomorrow.
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
This isn't just a hangover. I can feel the blood moving through my veins, and it hurts.
don't act like you've never hung your towel on your dick after getting out of the shower
Guess who just made out with Sloth from The Goonies!
I dunno, there's just something so\ncomforting about having his penis in my mouth.
I've got to stop fucking tourists. If Chicagos piazza is anything like their dicks. I'm moving.
I walked into the living room this morning and he was there with 3 shots in a row. He said it was "tea time."
was his pinky out?
FUCK and YOU. times 10. To infinity and beyond. You bastard. Worst. Cockblock. Ever. I'm going to nail your sister.
I was cock-blocked by a swat team last night.
She said my penis was powerful and magnificent
He's petting your head, we need to leave now.
The weekend was a blur. There was vodka and penises and orgasms. I played a game of Cock Roulette and won big
Randomize
