Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
she gave me a schnouzer then wanted to kiss while we were having sex...i had to puppy slap her nose. pick me up out front.
we went to the store to buy cookie dough and conditionally went straight towards the booze
yeah, it's no longer just 'day drinking' when it's 5pm and you're knocking over fruit displays at fresh market
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
thanks for celebrating my birthday so severely 2 years ago. i just found your hospital discharge papers in my closet.
anything for my little brother.
Just wanna let u know that we are almost on the pity blow job level of our friendship.
I took so my adderall all I can do is lie on my floor and stare too hard at my hedgehog. He has 42 spines in the dark spot on his shoulder btw.
Bro, you're like, my right testicle. Can't go anywhere without you.
I think he just tried to put your boyfriend in a trashcan....
You threw your body across the gross couple hooking up on the couch and demanded they scratch your back. I love you drunk on peach schnapps
The council and I are about to open up a bottle of malort.
UPGATe: THE COUNCIL AND I HAVE AGREED TO BAHN MALORT FROM THE HOUSEHOLD
Good, I don't think Coke dipped ring pops hold up in the mail anyway.
So...a chick sucked my crank...now her dog is licking my feet. I feel like a pharoh on vacation.
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