Tell me why I go to the dollar store for nail polish remover and a ghetto black dude trys to hit on me in the parking lot, then he gets in line behind me with a dousche bag literally and that is his only purchase.
Dude, no matter how drunk you are, it's not okay to hug every other guy at a strip club. Mainly because boners are far too common.
we were going to warn you, but we veto-ed that idea somewhere between "this is the stupidest thing we've ever done" and "let's order a pizza"
You know the gilmore girls would be alright if it was on mute the whole time
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
One last question would your parents let me sleep in your bathtub for the night?
You called me 32 times last night just to tell me you felt a heartbeat in your vagina?
I just got breakfast in bed and he went down on me. And you though he was a bad idea. Shame
It's after midnight. I didn't find the answer to my problem, but I did find the bottom of a bottle of vodka, so... there's that.
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
the worst fight me and my gf ever had was over Guy fieri
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
I just puke and rallied at my anniversary dinner #winning
The tequila monkeys have a drum solo in my skull right now. I can't imagine Emily feels better.
You tried to see how many socks you can stuff in yor mouth and I just put on a damp sock. Is this what bestfriends have come to these days???
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