she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
If I say "It's good enough" and I'm not talking about a sandwhich, that's your queue to stop me, you're supposed to be my friend.
Leave it to him to get us kicked out of a bar for hitting on an 80 year old woman. I want to be that wasted one day.
if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
If I go there, please come with. It will accelerate the lesbian rumor but be totally worth it.
ALTON JUST DID GRAVY SHOTS. THIS IS WHY HE'S MY HERO
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
She's going to be the first to die of too much illness. Not even super bad stuff like cancer but like for having a cold at the same time as a sore throat and chlamydia or something. Just too much diseases.
no we have a special triathlon I'm entering us in. drinking, fucking, and sleeping. I think we have a good shot.
This little girl and her dad are walking behind me. "Why is he wearing pajamas?" Mind your own business, kid.
I need to wear something that says I would have sex with you but I'm not going to
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
Can't talk, I'm icing "sorry I barfed on your couch" onto a cookie cake
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