At a place where you lie naked on a big pile of pillows and they feed you lobster. You eat it with your bare hands.
I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
On a scale of one to america, how free are you this weekend?
I'm gonna make a mold of your dick so I can make popsicles
You're the third person who's asked me for an afternoon blow connection in one day. Unreal.
That's more of a you-issue than a me-issue
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
I picked up the bartender so he could open the bar early and ended up with him giving me a ride home when he closed. I like snowdays and everything, but they get really expensive. Also, I think I threw up on his front door. Not checking.
A special kind of bond is formed between two people when they act as a pee shield for one another for drunken pisses in an alleyway
WAIT MOM THIS DOESNT NEED TO BE A FAMILY EVENT OK AARON DOESNT NEED TO BE AROUND FOR NIPPLEGATE 2014
I'm never celebrating Galentine's Day again. It was a whorrific mess.
New guy moved in the apartment next door. He's a combat vet, 6'4", Adonis body and going to med school. My vagina is chewing thru the wall as we speak.
i just got carded for condoms. wtf.....this is new. isnt safe sex a good thing?
Also while I’m drunk I saw your penis in like 4th grade when I walked past the boys bathroom
Only good thing about being an essential worker is that I have a letter allowing me to cross the bridge into jersey to get booze
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