I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
when i tried to put the condom on he started screaming about how he didn't want his groceries bagged
Tomorrow, you will get a text, and it will bE spelled right, that's me yo, certify ya soon
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sit down my child. It's time you were told of my famous loss-of-virginity story entitled, "The Penis that Never Could."
Hey ask him if he likes swappy seconds
Dude you spent 20 minutes on the phone with dominos answering machine trying to order a pizza
You in for a dick vacation?
YES, even though I have no idea what that means
I told her my cab was outside the club and that I had to go, but I think we both knew this wasn't going anywhere past the sloppy bathroom handjob.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well yes he stayed. He brought Guiness, them he shaved me. It's a long, but beautiful story.
I'm just opting for alcohol abuse, ramen and cuddling with my dog for now.
Please hurry. I'm the only one here who's not an attorney with a trophy wife.
The more I think about it, the more convinced I am that I'm the solution to all of T-Swift's guy problems.
Some guy walking down the sidewalk just looked at me and said "hey it's the world champ". How drunk was I on Friday...?
My ex's girlfriend just invited me clubbing. Guess who won the breakup?
Randomize