party started at 10. cops are coming to shut us down now and its 11. i already lostmy underwear and im wearing a sparkly thong on my haed. this has to be some kinda record.
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
My dad walked in on me masturbating in my own apartment.....my own apartment!!
My mother walked into the bathroom at 345 am while I was splashing in the bathtub with the remnants of her birthday cake all over me... she looked at me and walked out...
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
I picked up the bartender so he could open the bar early and ended up with him giving me a ride home when he closed. I like snowdays and everything, but they get really expensive. Also, I think I threw up on his front door. Not checking.
he puked all over my guest bed and the said he felt good enough to clean it up. he poured bleach all over the bed and passed out in it. he had the chemiacal burn for a month...
Nothing says "class act" like eating acid in the middle of a Buffalo Wild Wings
Okay. So I've done lines off a bible. But that's just for the sake of being cliché.
P.s. I wore your shirt today and it has your blood all over it, but I am at a funeral home and they are using embalming fluid to get your blood stains out right now.
At first I was nervous, then drunk me thought: What other chance will you realistically have to fuck a British guy?
Pretty sure I got at least one girl to question her sexuality at the Christmas party last night
looked it up online and zoo tickets are only 20 bucks and there's also a museum of science close to the hotel.
i'm not going to a FUCKING museum. i want to be wasted and possibly double penetrated... have you EVER been on vacation?
We were driving past a farm when he screamed at me to stop the car, then he jumped out and tried to ride a cow.
I don't want to go to sleep. I like partying with myself.
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