How do u get a lost condom out? Like really lost... up there...
I just google mapped his house on satellite so i can really see how much money he has. Does that make me shallow?
i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
she uses eco-friendly sex toys. she is the literal definition of a hippie.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i had to wake up at 4 am to do my laundry because I was afraid if I saw people in the laundry room they would judge me by the amount of clothes I had covered in vomit from syllabus week
Just remember that she is a giant dick-sucking forehead and you are better than that.
She's been drinking and was roller blading. I'm sure you can do the math
It was my penance. God came down to me in the form of an angel and said, "you must atone for your sins, by puking in your mouth at church right before communion"
when your 30 and im 37 and we're lonely and single, lets make a pact to murder each other.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Would it be inappropriate to rub one out in the gym shower? I mean, technically, I pay $80 a month to do what I want so could they really say anything?
Shower is fine. Steam room is shady. I've probably done both at one point in my life so I can't be used as a good reference.
shes making a cheerios necklace using dental floss 'just in case' she gets the munchies later
Which one of you drunk assholes put a parental lock on my cable box last night? More importantly, what's the pin? I'm missing the UK game.
There's just no proper way to thank a man for that many consecutive orgasims.
I feel like I put a fire out with my hand but idk if that was a dream or not
It's hard not to feel like a terrible person with bruises on your tits.
Randomize