I've never had a man I enjoyed more than steak
I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
if my vagina gave out awards, he should be preparing acceptance speaches for the oscar, the heisman and the nobel peace prize.
I love seeing the creepers that friend request me outside of facebook. its like seeing a unicorn in the middle of campus.
I woke up and someone had put toast at my feet. I was SO. HAPPY.
Just found a 7-11 receipt for new years eve at 1:30 am apparently we felt the need to buy three jars of pickles and a gallon of milk does this ring any bells?
bleeding from the face, sitting in a shopping cart and holding a wad of ripped caution tape. what else would i be doing?
You act as if I'm the first person to pee in the Taco Bell drive thru at 2 AM, I'm sure a lot worse things have happen in that drive thru than my urine.
And then he said he would build me a mountain dew water fountain
Marry him now.
You just gave me the title for the series of our lives. Haha. Chapter 12: the cocaine on the back of the hairbrush
This day took a left turn at "This is your going away party, I got a bunch of blow."
Sigh. I haven't seen a dick since August 22nd. And in case you forgot, it's January.
He was awesome with her today. I can't say that it didn't make my Fallopian tubes sing "The Hills Are Alive."
How don't you remember..? You were getting handfuls of skittles out from our bra screaming TASTE THE RAINBOW.
It was terrible. I am sore from head to toe, neither of us got off, and we were at it for an hour and a half, I faked having a heart episode so we could stop. It worked.
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