Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
Yeah. My legs are trembling...hard to walk. Feels like a neon arrow is pointing at me saying "just had sex (with not his wife)"
Do you know how hard it is to masturbate with a runny nose?
i'm almost done photoshopping my face on his wife. it's a done deal
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
If I could have all the money back from the pregnancy test i've bought- I could buy myself a vacation.
Or a large amount of condoms?!?
Before you say anything, my vagine does NOT discriminate against young dads
let's see, i ended up walking for an hour towards a macdonalds that didnt exist, sprinted full tilt into a powerline, and left a 30 dollar tip to a waitress at dennys we made friends with. I REGRET NOTHING
I know we said we never would. But try fucking a fat guy. He put in so much more effort and then made me waffles.
If I was home I'd be ouija boarding the fuck out of the house, haven't been this high since that day
The notification you get from snapchat that someone took a screenie is like a formal declaration of blackmail.
We're now referring to our nightly Skype time as "strokes of genius." Long distance sucks.
and you fell through a lawn chair
I just left and he walked me out and went call me if you're ever... Eh... Whatever. And walked away.
Taking one of the loudest shits ever at work and I have to say...I'm having a better time than I thought I would
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