who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
Where were you when I was single???
Still in diapers.
the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
He's sobering up. It was really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together.
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
Last I saw him was around 10 this morning. He was passed out on the porch with his head under the barbeque cover and there were cups of orange juice around him as well as loose tobacco spread everywhere. Good luck getting a hold of him.
i know it happened because it happened right beside me, and at one point on top of me.
Thing I said while arguing: I want to be single again so that I can have pizza and dick rained down upon me.
Pulling out all the stops on being a lady.
I fucked my cousin and caught chlamydia this year. I can't really harbour any illusions about myself anymore.
Why are you there anyways?
Pickin up ball pit balls from craigslist
Best ethics paper a stoner could write. I called my professor Dr. Superfly Arandia. And I'm pretty sure I used "respect the hustle" somewhere in there too.
Turns out the creepy dude who bought us tequila shots was the friend of a friend who then got us a table and several large bottles of champagne.
Never judge a man by his mustache.
I can't possibly be the only person who has ever eaten Cheetos with a spoon to avoid the powder getting in my fingers
Lunch date was a success. And you'll be proud- my legs stayed closed.
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