Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
my credit card is covered in vodka and bad memories
I just want you to know IcyHot in the ear is weird. Don't ask.
On the bright side, I hit her with the door on the way in
I go to a class slightly intoxicated and they bring in a baby. What a life.
I gave you a piece of bread to sober you up. You wiped your face off with it and then gave it back to me.
tanning, a slurpee, and a cigarette. spa day college edition
Do you still have "be bumpin" written on your ass in glitter pen? Who brings a glitter pen to a bar? Or pulls there ass out for that matter...
dude girls our age are getting married and having babies and I still can't figure out how to defrost my hotpockets
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
I literally ate pizza on a toilet and made up reasons as to why you should make out with that boy. I am unstoppable.
They sent him a photo of me smoking a bong whilst wearing the dinosaur head. I think that's the last we hear of his nonsmoking fitness freak ass 🤷🏼♀️
But I put cranberries and apples in my wine so it's festive drinking not suicidal drinking
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
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