Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
I just puked in the walgreens aisle buying gatorade and advil for my hangover... i guess i failed
Also, just saw a homeless man answer a phone call on a blackberry...
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
Im going to buy a thermometer. If its above 104 im going to the hospital if its under 104 im going to the bar
You left a trail of sequins from your dress incase we got lost
First coke bust down the road. Spring is finally here.
Why did I wake up holding food tongs?
Apparently I told the bartender to stop putting ice in my drink because it was taking up too much room
Ugh did we play golf last night and did you by chance hit my head with a club or a ball?
As soon as he came we went to Dairy Queen. That drive through lady was very condescending about our "just fucked" ice cream.
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
I miss you, too. It's hard to sleep without anything licking my head.
i woke up wearing a life jacket, holding on to a footlong hotdog, and had on a mr. hustle 1995 shirt on
good night
I just threw up in front of a bunch of parents/prospective students while they were on a campus tour..awesome..
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