bar tonight had a doorbell to get in and last night i saw my neighbors fuck on the balcony, she wore a nurse outfit. Missouri isn't so bad...
How has he not realized you're pregnant?
Spanx.
he only lasted 2 minutes. he said it was because i was so pretty. i'm not sure what to feel right now.
the table of underagers at this wedding were seated 10ft from the open bar. currently 30 open containers on the table for 5 people. dinner hasn't even been served yet.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
No one wears that much makeup to work unless they are trying to fuck their boss, NO ONE
Don't let the fact that shes seen my penis discourage you
I'm going to die alone in my chair and get eaten by my cat. That kind of break up.
if I'm at school tomorrow just indulge my moment of pity and let me cry on your shoulder
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was his first time doing shrooms and we made him ride in the truck bed. But he kept standing up and yelling when we stopped so we had to keep driving
WHAT GOOD IS APPRECIATING IF NOBODY'S NAKED
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
8 stitches. Next time I decide to twerk while doing a keg stand, stop me.
I'm just gonna put on a documentary and throw up
Heels with jeans turned Casual Friday into Casual Sex With My Boss Friday
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