if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
dude i woke up sitting indian style with my face on the ground and my hand in a bucket of ice.
I just sent her mug shot out in a mass text because I hate her and her cocaine eyes are hilarious.
when someone at the bar asked you a question all you knew how to say was "chug-a-lug"
apparently I crawled into someone's bed and demanded they call me 'big dog' before shotgunning a beer
I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
Sometimes I actually rage on Tuesday, come back, and do homework drunk and pull an all nighter.
Someone drunkenly cleaned and organized my car last night... Nothing's missing, so that's a plus.
You should feel special! You're also the only person I've ever punched during sex
I love that my family celebrates every holiday with a joint. Chanukah? Mazel-juana! Easter? What's more spring than the color green? Election day? What better way to celebrate democracy in action than medical pot?
I kinda wanna drive through the Gator bar parking lot and seeing if my panties are on they ground, they should be right next to my pride...
I haven’t been this excited since I found out they sold cases of Jack Daniels.
You kept sayin "its alright, I'm pre-med" to everything we said. EVERYTHING.
Randomize
