so my phone accidentally called my dad from my purse at 2:14am....he has a 5 min voicemail of me discussing how Alicia should bang the guy who eats good pussy... i can never look at my dad in the face again....
I can handle NPR. I speak hippie. I took it in college.
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
He just did blow off my nipples. He's not serious about his girlfriend.
Also, we should really buy some bandaids. Right now I'm using toilet paper and scotch tape, but I don't really think that's sanitary.
Breaking a step ladder over someone's back turned into a really fun game, way too quickly.
Last I saw, they went for a smoke and only one came back. He passed out outside. I'm glad he's only 120lbs. I left him on the rug still. My mom is gonna be pissed.
Like an undercooked grilled cheese that got cold again. But hairy.
And there goes my desire for sandwiches. Forever.
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
You can't just say you're dying of terminal cancer everytime they try to card you
At one point I was counting his nipple hairs to calm myself down.
i am currently wearing a bowl of frosting on my head. i do not regret any of my life choices leading to this moment
My vagina is the only part of me that is pleased you lived through last night.
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
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