I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
went to sleep on the couch in jeans and socks. woke up in bed totally nude no memory of moving. best farewell party ever
so you masturbated because Oprah told you?
and yes, the jail cell in Citi Field does have a big Mets symbol in it
The state of Wisconsin is just irresponsible for letting me buy this many fireworks
Besides the whole peeing blood for a week thing, it was the best sex of my life.
I've never felt so epic in my entire life as I do right now, my bare testicles staring down the ocean itself
I dont think getting to 3rd base with a girl you barely know is the type of memory they had in mind when they named the park "memorial park"
We are planning a drunk snapchat treasure hunt for tomorrow, and the treasure is his penis, this is a game I'm not willing to loose.
"I'm looking more at his dick bulge." Never thought I'd hear those words come out of my boyfriend's mouth.
Can we discuss your tits for a sec? That melon patch sprung up over night
I will never look at a penis the same again. After that I will appreciate them so much more than I do. Makes me wanna kiss yours just for being pretty
I'm so excited you texted me but I'm way to high to process it
I just wish the first erections of my life didn't take place at a dentists office but hey whatever I turned out alright
he was like tryna hang and chat and I was like dude there's an iguana in this room
Randomize
