I just woke up in the back of his van. Bring me a sunkist.
Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
and now I know what throwing up pineapple chunks is like.
Yeah, we had those soaking in vodka for like 36 hours
outstanding.
Did you spray paint that captain morgan fifth that's in the freezer gold?
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
Roommate is eating a chimichanga, watching Dr Doolittle 2 and weeping. His Tuesday hangovers make me feel better about my life.
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
As I am reading this. I'm standing in my underwear eating taquitos. I'm saying this in the most loving way possible: FUCK OFF.
So for future reference.... it's a little unnerving when I can't get hold of you, and the last communication we had was, "Oh fuck... It's tequila"
Ummmm you know you're drinking vodka out of a Skittles bag, right?
He was only in jail for 4 hours before he was someone's prison wife
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
i knew it was a party when i saw you sitting on the couch naked with the keg in your lap, still drinking and passing out cups
Yay I only have ONE giant mystery bruise from yesterday
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