Now there are nude photos of that bangin hot Russian spy chick...this is officially the best scandal ever.
He literally just walked in some random persons house and walked right to they're pantry. Then five minutes later he walks out with pop-tarts, mac and cheese, and captain morgan. We need to chill with this kid more often.
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
On a scale of 1 to "bad descision", where does stealing my racist neighbors dog and giving him my roomates dildo for a chew toy rate?
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Just successfully made home fries from potatoes we used as bowls while stoned as shit. I deserve a trophy.
I'm just gonna pretend you didn't ask me that. I'll sweep that shattered moment of our friendship under the shame rug.
This family outing has commenced with me throwing up in an apple orchard
Almost to my house to grab beer. And pants.
Just told myself the phrase "You're not THAT single" while dressing myself
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I fell asleep while eating jimmy johns last night and then woke up at 5am and continued to eat it
He just started dry humping the air... I'm done
WE ARE DOOMED.
And not the good kind of doomed. Assuming there is one.
it isn't the robot apocalypse that's for sure
I can't wait to get to LA so I can punch her in the face
I am pants-free in the living room. This is liberating.
I just want to find somebody intelligent enough to trick my parents into thinking she's not a trophy wife. Is that too much to ask?
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