playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
the drag queen on stage looks like shes wearing the EXACT same dress i wore 2 senior prom.
I GOT MY PERIOD!
damn. i had names picked out.
Waiting outside the STD clinic 30 min before it opens already in a line up. It's like were all waiting for a concert that no ones really pumped for
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we've got reservations. ask for the eat a bag of dicks table
Im drunk on a hayride surrounded by toddlers. they are judging me.
Guess who won a bet and gets to name it Optimus prime if it's a boy
Nevermind. Totally worth it.
I am pretty sure we beat baby seals over the head in a past life. That is why we are being punished.
Lock the bathroom door next time you are going to masterbate with the shower head, okay?
I was just power-washing my vagina.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In other news my pubic hair is covered in glitter.
OMFG. JUST WALKED IN ON A DUDE JERKING IT IN THE MCDONALDS BATHROOM
Stall or urinal?
You know that thing where you wouldn't typically eat ass but you're in love with him so you want to eat his ass, because it's HIS ass
No I will not paint you for Mardi Gras in town. It is going to rain and you don't need another ID charge
I wish there were more things in this world as wonderful as string cheese
Surriously
there's fucking coffee grinds packed all inside my pipe. what did i do
Randomize