Turns out I'm like the Wayne Gretzky of hiding cum. Who knew?
So at what point do I tell her that I like fucking these hot southern girls more than I like my relationship with her?
it's been dubbed the summer of antibiotics
I guess I made wings because there's chicken everywhere. Even on the walls. 3 of them. It's like a chicken grave yard.
never underestimate the power of walking into a bar alone in uv cat makeup.. took home a seven foot man
Well I can cross being naked in a minivan off the list
I would of joined had I not blacked out last night and ran around naked breaking things till 4 am
woke up to find i out made out with his roommate before hooking up with him. breakfast was awkward to say the least
he told me he didn't like my name so he was going to call me Casey instead
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
You're the only person I know who would go to New Jersey to give a blowjob and I have so much respect for you for it
Well we found Mark's missing underwear. They're pinned up on Mike's trophy wall.
I was just informed that I asked for a glass of wine at the police station
I'm sure it would have gone very well with the cigarette you lit there.
Also I found $40 in the women's bathroom at ihop. Karma is finally kicking in!
Let's not forget that we had sex on the ground in public tonight.
Randomize
