But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
the quote on the bathroom wall was "stop reading this and focus on peeing" and i realized i'd peed on the seat.
did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
My farts smell like St. Pauli Girl. Last night was too much for a Monday.
Defiantly just threw away our yearly bottle collection in front of the campus tour. The school should pay me for recruitment
Weddings at vineyards should never be allowed to happen. I'm pretty sure I drank every bottle they produced in 2008.
It was like the perfect storm of bad decisions.
Does he cat effect his dick pics to you? Because THAT is true love
Today is going to be the longest game of "was that a fart, or do I need to go wipe?" I have ever played. Maybe the most challenging too.
It was an "I snuck in through the window at 5am with my underwear in my pocket" kind of night.
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
My kid just put flowers in my hair to make me pretty, then showed my boobs to an entire playground. He's either the best wingman or the worst.
This ice cream is 10x better than the sex I had yesterday
This is a long quiet interstate without somebody to sext.
How did I get home last night?
We put your keys on a lanyard that asked anyone that found you to bring you home. A nice man in a cape, green shorts and a mesh shirt dropped you off this morning.
Oh. Yeah. Riiiggghhht
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