You know you're true friends when you can talk about what sexual diseases you may or may not have.
dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
you told me to make out with him to promote the social success of the sorority
Dude has a bag of wine attached to his belt. These guys don't fuck around.
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
Dude their dog does tricks for sips of beer. He keeps going up next to people and trying to shake. This is awesome.
Listen, it's not like I meant to bust the window out. It just sort of happened. And I'm also sorry for stealing your dads bandanas.
He's rapping about a turtle neck sweater. Please come get me.
if you fuck our toilet off the wall again, i'm going to be so mad.
All I know is you walked out of the kitchen in some kind of French onion dip bra and started passing out individual chips to guys saying " do you dip?"
Dude I just realized i did a camper walk of shame in front of amish people. I should have asked for cheese and a home made pie to cover it up. Im just lost shopping in amish country nothing to see here
Let go out that Thursday night!
Yess sounds good, I have to go turn myself in the next day because what happened last Friday.
roommate singing save a horse ride a cowboy wearing a cowboy hat a bikini and jeans while humping the couch.
I tried to fuck you in my bathroom while my parents were in the next room. I am a clusterfuck of fun.
If there's someone that knows accidental pantlessness, it's Mike.
Randomize
