you were holding her hair as she threw up saying "I'm going to be a great doctor" repeatedly.
so my dad walked in on us having sex
lulz really? why?
lets just say he wont be answering to 'daddy' for a loooooong time
please don't let me die tonight
what have you done for me lately?
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
I'll call you tomorrow. I'm ok and back i love you goodnight.
I stole a bike. Here's a pic
Yea idk it was like early in the morning and you were walking around with no shoes carrying a printer
When you hit the 45 minute mark of any argument about The Flintstones, you have to realize: it's no longer you arguing, it's the cocaine arguing.
if creating a fake 8 year old brother, who lives with me and has had mono for the past month, to explain why I have ignored my group project members is wrong, then I... well then I'm probably going to hell
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The sigh of relief when u realize none of your drunk texts will result in permanent damage
How bad would it be if I wore out the dress we got peed on in. You're the only one who knows.
We had sex in the church bell tower and somehow it still feels right.
I feel like a drive thru vagina
Tears For Fears is the only thing getting me through life at this moment.
I tried to face swap with Chuck Norris. His face was too powerful... it broke my snap chat.
Randomize