"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
just realized the sink is the perfect height to piss into never cleaning the toilet again
that cunt stole my fb status. SHE'S NOT THAT FUNNY
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
Wake and baked to watch the boston marathon. God I love massachusetts
Im about to have a threesome, Ill pay you twenty bucks to go clean my room. Just throw it all in the closet.
open bar reception. dayglow. pray for me
Woke up laying in the kitchen floor with a cup in one hand and the beer tap in the other. Guess I just needed that one last beer.
That's okay, during storytime I would have to sit on my hands so I wouldn't touch everyone. Explains a lot...
If I had to give her an idea on what it means to be ur date I would compare it to being Ralph macchio's gf in the first karate kid... That's one of the coolest things I've ever said... I love drugs.
Why would I send you a picture of it when I could just steal the gnome and put it in your bed with you? Admit it, he looks just like gnomeo!
That point of drunk where you're in a bar bathroom and you're like "F*ck you bra! I'm not taking your sh*t anymore! and you take it off and throw it in a trashcan.
There is not enough soap in the world to make me feel clean after last night. Im gonna need jesus for this one
My mom just made me promise her that i'll care about the next guy I sleep with
Pretty sure I used toilet water to wash vomit off my face last night...
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