last night I thought his shirt said yale... but this morning it definitely says old navy.
I got my nipple pierced! I love it so much!
Well, there goes breastfeeding.
if reincarnation is for serious, i better be a guy in my next life
with a huge shlong
massive. i wanna make bitches cry
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
These 25 People Had Very Inappropriate Sexual Relations(hips)
Sorry I couldn't get my dick out
well we are all hammered and my parents are reminiscing about all the times they drove us home drunk from Christmas
Drunk man just did a hand stand, fell over, knocked over a whole table of desserts, and didnt lose his cowboy hat. winner.
thank god my boss can't smell the tequila on my breathe over the phone.
at that time a 4 pound meatball stuffed with pizza rolls seemed more important than bailing you out of jail.... sorry.
These 31 People Are Lazier Than You Could Ever Imagine
I'm not really into her personality. Not that we've ever looked for personality in women.
That's only a quality to look for in a second marriage.
I know that was a dream because I woke up and there was no pizza
The hookers weren't a dream get tested
Pretty sure I just convinced a drunk guy at the train station that I was from the future
You're getting spoiled, you better send me at least a side boob pic if you wanna see my dick dressed up as Davie Crockett.
think I signed up for a 5k last night while blackout.
Wow! It's so great to hear from you! We all thought you perished in Winepocalypse 2012, man.