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We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
I don't make mistakes...just understandable bad choices.
"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
I've officially put my junk in foods from 5 of the 6 layers of the nutrition pyramid
just got drunk at a party with Christmas themed solo cups.. holidays are officially here.
just ran into a kid I used to hook up with while wearing his shirt. Only me. I tried to pretend like it wasn't his but it said his name on the back so I wasn't winning that.
There's a hand-carved wooden bong in my backpack, and i really wish i could remember last night now.
You left a trail of sequins from your dress incase we got lost
Dude, if she brings up the lube, you know nothing
Remember the time we were in the hospital and I wanted to steel the arm restraints and use them as sex toys?? Oh college memories....
hungover and i feel like a burrito
like eating one or like you are one?
like i am one.
Um...any recollection of peeing in the pantry
Walking through campus with a grocery bag full of pot brownies. I'm like the santa claus of 4/20
PS: when I ask you if I look fat in a a dress DO NOT TAKE YOUR SWEET ASS GAY TIME to formulate an answer only to tell me in front of our family that perhaps I should buy Spanx. Do you WANT me to tell mom and dad you suck cock? Then be a good brother and have the common decency to LIEEEEEE!!!!
I'm hungover from arbor mist I'm so white
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