how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
At 4am he sent "uree asss ize anmazin"
Upon further investigation it turns out it wasn't blood, but chocolate frosting from the cupcake I shoved in my pocket to "save for later"
I go to a class slightly intoxicated and they bring in a baby. What a life.
Its official vodka lemonade jager and whiskey with coorslight is a bad combination of try to forget the work week cocktail ps bring alkaseltzer
We found him in the neighbors shed using a bicycle as a blanket. We just left him there.
My car smells like beer, you're here in spirit
I will refer to it as the penis of glory... he fucked me for 3 and a half hours - and all he needed was a 5 minute power nap in the middle (which he took WHILE INSIDE ME). I plan on staying with him forever
if it doesnt flame it aint got game is a bad drinking motto eyebrow-wise.
eyebrows regrow, your balls dont
Well I don't think you can suck his dick while he's making pizza. I think that goes against some health codes.
He drinks vodka like healthy people drink water and I wanted to have his adopted gay babies. That's all. I'm going to go find him and potentially propose.
Good news, my sex bruises are fading. Bad news, my boobs look like I have a skin disease because of it.
While buying Plan B the lady at the counter looked at me and said hope you have a successful night as I walked away in shame
He looks like Aladdin, and that's about all he's got going for him.
Randomize
