Obv we're gonna bbm each other in bed
Why are handjobs necessary in class?
I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
I just spent my lunch hour driving around campus yelling "TRADE LIVES WITH ME!" to all the freshmen moving in
Desperate + desperate does not equal a fun night.
I am so stoned and my professor is handing out candy. I love Halloween.
jacking off on stolen wireless... gotta enjoy the small things in life
i feel like his penis is a security blanet. i cant fall asleep unless its in my hand
you woke me up in the middle of the night to tell me you were taking off your pants and it was not an invitation.
I have a meeting at work in an hour, I'm so hungover going outside is NOT happening there are roads and shit I'll totally get myself killed.
There's a questionable stain on Harley's bed...would they have sex on a dog bed?
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
We have started to decorate penises.
In my drunk state I was like I ONLY HAD SEX WITH SOMEONE ELSE BECAUSE HE WAS THE HOTTEST GUY IVE EVER EVEN SEEN
I’m going to try to be less of a cryptic bitch this week. Should be nice.
Randomize
