would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
So I went outside my house this morning and basically my entire front lawn is covered in gummi bears... I think that involves you guys.
I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
Oh it's happening. I'm Chugging a beer while sitting next to a 6 year old
He said to me this morning that we should finish these beers, go and get plan B then on the way back, go to the pub to celebrate the death of our baby. I love Manchester.
Why is there a school picture of an 8 year old boy in my pocket...?
Its like the unofficial aniversary of the loss of her virginity. And I will be giving tours of the spot they did it in and showing how I'm serious when I say the grass doesn't grow there anymore.
I just had a contest with the toilet to see who could hold their breath longest.
I won
im going to hold it over his head for all of eternity. when his children are born i am going to go to the hospital as his wife is giving birth and shove the picture in the childs face, so the first time they see their father is in a drunken stupor looking like a jackass.
Remember that time you bought snap bracelets on Amazon and they sent you 300 pregnancy tests instead? Amazon knows.
The guy at the ER said it was the first time he's given stitches for a funneling accident. Then he seemed upset that I took pride in that...
My very favorite thing in the whole world is when guys try to booty call her as I'm fucking her. Sucks to suck.
He asked me for a pic so I sent him a pic of my boyfriends dick.
My history professo slid into my DMs. Granted I did give him “fuck me” eyes during a lecture a few times.
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