paul mccartney is starting to look like angela lansbury
You should have seen k-money last night. She was just hanging on to the toilet for half the night. By her fourth trip to puke, she started talking to it and was doing the voices for her and it. She kept saying "...we thank you for your continued business..." haha
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
They are literally fucking next to the DJ Booth to a techno Remix to Pacman. She is going waka waka waka. WHY ARE YOU NOT HERE FOR THIS?!
I would have to gauge my vagina to make it fit.
Oh my god I'm so bored. The virgin is so disinteresting when I'm not trying to cum on her face.
yo your bro wants to know what time he got home and were you hosing him off
Why the fuck did I wake up in a chair with mouth clamps?!
got one for peeing in public....called the cop a donut dunking communist...should be a fun court appearance
Great sex, the promise of us mixing our excellent genetics in the future, and access to drugs are mainly what's holding this relationship together at the moment
Say whatever you bloody well like; you don't know the true meaning of life until you have smoked to a Sade cd.
I mean I'd assume the strange looks are on account of the fact that I'd imagine people normally don't stink of booze on an 8:14am flight.
I was too lazy to get my chapstick out of my purse so i lubed up my lips with pizza grease. On a scale of 1-10 how embarassed should i be?
when i woke up w mysterious sticky crap in my hair, i assumed i had another blackout hookup. nope. turns out i made PBJ and proceeded to pass out in it. i ate the evidence when i woke up.
Three cans of beer can fit in the shower catty... multi tasking
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